07 August 2006

Mike Rowe LOVES me

I have to confess something. I am having an affair. Of course, it's all in my mind.

In my wacky world, where the sky is perfectly pink all of the time, Mike Rowe thinks I am fabulous. He can't wait to ask me how my day was. He always notices when I do something to my hair. He looks forward to cooking culinary delights while reading Jane Austen aloud to me in that husky man voice he has. He frets about my angst over Mr. Darcy. Mike always wants everything to be perfect, and he always wants it to be so FOR ME!

Godiva Hazelnut Shells? He never forgets to pick them up. The perfect bouquet of salmon pink roses, peonies, and tulips? He picks the stems out himself to insure my satisfaction. A perfectly inspired love note? He leaves me one every day. Arguments? Never! He knows I am always right.

He is just so....wonderful.

He really is a lovely celebrity boyfriend.

Which means I can NEVER meet him.

The real Mike Rowe is probably a very nice person. I don't really know anything about him. He might be a complete slob like my husband. He might have serious issues with important dates like my husband. He might hog the remote like my husband.

Mike might be just like my husband in real life. So what would be the point?

My Mike is fabulous. If Mike is also your celebrity boyfriend, I am sure your version is lovely as well. There are plenty of Mikes to go around. I do have to thank everyone who stops by looking for Mike. It's nice to meet you. Mike is the number one referrer to my blog.

See how he takes care of me?

I do enjoy my celebrity boyfriends. You can't do that whole perfect life thing with real people. Hot guys you know in real life invariably do something to burst the bubble. It never fails.

The only exception are firefighters.

Aaaaahhh, firefighters!

That's a whole other post.